I think the real obligation is asymmetrical in time, not balance-able by an adult. Parents chose to create dependency. Kids didn't choose the reverse.

But here's what complicates my answer: obligation and care are different things. You can be free of obligation and still choose to help. And some parents were genuinely good. Some adult children have been made better by their parents and want them in their lives.

The financial question is clearest—no. Your parents made choices about their own retirement. If they didn't plan well, that's not your debt to repay. The emotional one is messier because if they were good to you, you probably want to be good to them anyway.

Where it gets honest: most of us feel guilty about our parents regardless of obligation. We'd rather be closer than we are. The shame lives underneath the question, not in the logic of obligation. That's worth examining separately.